Arachnophobia

Eva insisted on taking her two spider toys to bed with her last night.
Daphne hates spiders.
So we had an arachnophile and an arachnophobe sharing a room.
Eva promised solemnly not to put them anywhere near Daffy, and off they went to sleep.
Midnight - screams from Daphne. "Get those spiders off me. I don't want any spiders in my bed....Aaaaarrrrgghghhh."
I stagger in, woken from a delicious heavy sleep - "Don't be so silly Daphne. Stop crying. There aren't any bloody spiders."
Back to bed. Whimpering gradually turns to more crying.
"If you don't stop crying, I'm going to take your diggly-nightie away".
That works for a while, but the whimpering starts again.
FOUR TIMES I got out of bed. In the end Si took her off to the bathroom for a stern fatherly lecture.
Needless to say, the spiders have been put in the top cupboard, along with the Emu.